JUST NOW: Is getting married during a marathon the worst wedding you can think of?

Whitney and Steven’s wedding happened in downtown Detroit just before the marathon’s halfway point at mile marker 13.1. They made the event short — about 10 minutes — to keep their muscles from getting cold for when they hopped back in the race. 

“You are my guide, teacher and one true love,” Whitney, 31, told Steven, 33, as they exchanged vows in Woodward Avenue’s pedestrian plaza. 

She wore a white veil, aqua blue tank top and a white sequined skirt over her running tights. Steven dressed in full-length running tights and a long-sleeve shirt with a faux tuxedo design.

After exchanging vows and rings and gulping shot glasses of blue Gatorade, Whitney jettisoned her veil as she and Steven sprinted to rejoin the field of runners. – Detroit Free Press

Does it get anymore romantic than throwing on a tuxedo t-shirt after pounding through a half-marathon in sub 30-degree temperatures? What, not good enough for you? What if I told you the wedding would be on the corner of Woodward Avenue in Detroit? Still a no? What if we had a shot of Gatorade after and had to run the final half of the marathon after the wedding? No? Shocking. If you don’t want to get married in these conditions just don’t marry me at all.

In all reality this has to be the single worst idea and least romantic wedding experience in the history of mankind. There is no words to describe how dumb this is from the outside looking in. It’s like the husband had the idea and his wife just didn’t have it in her to tell the love of her life and future husband that the idea of a freezing cold marathon wedding is divorceable. In what world would anybody ever even think of getting married outside in 30-degree temperatures, let alone while in the middle of running 26.2 miles? Well, over 50% of marriages end in divorce and this might be one of them. Or is the bond and love so strong that they will be on the good side of this stat? Only time will tell.

On the bright side, the bride and groom didn’t have to pay for a venue, food and drinks for guests and they didn’t have to dance to “Shout” while having the most memorable night of their lives surrounded by all the people they love. Now they get to relax while doing absolutely nothing for the next week due to intense lactic acid build up and muscle soreness instead of cruising to the Bahamas just as the Michigan winter is intensifying. Not smart.

I will be shocked if I ever see a worse way to marry your significant other than in the middle of a freezing cold marathon. In the meantime the rest of us can keep going through life without a love as strong as this.

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